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Ready for the true confessions of a stay-at-home dad?

Be honest, when the topic of stay-at-home-dads (SAHD) comes up have you ever wondered if these Mr.
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James Depatie is a stay-at-home dad living in Greater Sudbury. He’s chronicling his family’s journey in a column for Northern Life. Supplied photo.
Be honest, when the topic of stay-at-home-dads (SAHD) comes up have you ever wondered if these Mr. Moms who chose family over career really exist?

Are they nothing but a paradigm used by wives to make their husbands feel guilty about not doing enough around the house? Or are they just mythical beings rooted in folklore and fairytales? For some people, it is difficult to envision a real SAHD beyond an emasculated portrayal of one from an Adam Sandler movie.
 
Chances are that if you ask around, many people would say that the notion of a SAHD is one that is still relatively uncommon in the minds of the masses — even though it is a growing segment in the realm of parenting. In fact, if you research the subject via Statistics Canada, you would find that in 1976 only two per cent of stay-at-home parents were daddies. That stat had grown to 11 per cent by 2014.

So while SAHDs may be historically rare, you can rest assured they are among us. They are, in fact, growing in numbers, and yes, they are likely used as examples by wives who enjoy guilt-tripping their husbands. But even then, have you ever met one?
 
Granted, some of you may be a friend of a friend to someone whose third cousin’s neighbour knew a guy from work who decided to take parental leave and become a SAHD.

The confession “I’m a stay-at-home dad” can sometimes elicit a sigh or a snicker, as some traditionally minded people may ask themselves “What man puts his career on hold and takes parental leave? What man decides to trade in his suits and ties for an apron and baby rattles?”
 
Well, allow me to take this opportunity to introduce myself. My name is James Depatie and I am one of those men.
 
For those who enjoy sports analogies (I do), I am a man who called time out on his career to become his family’s starting quarterback in order to help our newest draft pick learn the plays in the human development playbook.

Over the coming months, you are all invited to grab a front-row seat in Daddy Stadium while I provide you a glimpse into my world as I tackle the daily rigours and rewards of being a SAHD. We going to cover a lot of topics: the daunting first days alone with our newborn to her first words and everything in between. You will follow my roller coaster of emotions as I find a new sense of purpose independent from my career.  
 
Here is my promise to you, dear reader: I will pull no punches in my column. My views are my own and I will discuss candidly my experiences in tackling the ups and downs of the world of stay-at-home parenting — from a dad’s point of view.

I will be discussing my perspective, thoughts, stories and observations on the topic that is so close to my heart and I promise to keep you interested and engaged, and maybe even give you a chuckle now and then.

Those who know me say one of my best (and worst) qualities is my honesty. So rest assured, even if what I am writing about makes me appear foolish (it happens often), I will put my pen to paper with the same rigour as those times I appear to be a hero.

I will write my true feelings and experiences as they happen, as I take this journey down the road of stay-at-home-dad-ness. I hope you will join me for the ride — but please go potty before we leave and don’t make me turn this car around.

In my next column, I will introduce myself and my family a bit more and discuss how — and why — we made the decision that I become a SAHD.

James Depatie is a writer and parent who lives in Greater Sudbury. Got an idea or a question for him? Email James at [email protected] or follow him on Twitter @JamesDepatie.

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