Stop blaming rape victims

I was disheartened by Travis Morgan’s letter “Parents won’t do it, so schools must teach sex ed” (Thursday, March 5), in favour of Ontario’s new sexual education curriculum.

He makes several good points, but somehow ends up accusing girls and women of the crimes perpetrated against them. Twice in the same letter, no less: “This will actually reduce rape ... as girls will learn how to say no and stick to it.”

Later in the same letter, he states “Gone will be trashing girls because they said no, but didn’t know how to follow through.”

He seems to think that one of the main reasons girls are being raped or sexually molested is because they don’t know how to say no correctly.
Talk about blaming the victim for the crime. To put it simply: the main reason women and girls are raped is because men rape them. Against their will. No matter what men like Travis believe.

This is someone who believes himself to be enlightened, yet he ends up siding with the aggressors who, all too often, allege they didn’t know their partner was an unwilling one.

There are no “blurred lines” when it comes to consent, no matter what that catchy No. 1 hit on the radio claims.

If you are unsure if your partner is willing, you should ask. But that means you have to be willing to accept a “no.” And that is the point of educating kids about consent.

Yes, girls need to know it’s OK to say no when they’re uncomfortable, but no amount of saying no (even if they “stick to it”) will actually protect women until the men perpetrating these crimes learn to accept that “no.”

Mélissa Liard
Sudbury